- First Names - The unofficial meanings - Just for fun!
Aaron - ugly but hung like a horse, prone to belly button fluff.
Ada - blue haired, smells of wee.
Adam - cute, funny, chicks dig him, has the potential to be stalked.
Adrian - small todger, probably gay.
Aimee - Likes to strut her stuff, though theres not much 2 do so. Likes to play with cheese.
Aimz - Like Italian breakfast bread rolls. hollow on the inside. would die to screw a Lamar.
Aimz - limited intelligence.
Aisha - laughs like a demented dog, likes tic-tacs.
Alan - shy but sensitive, gets screwed over by women.
Alex - cute but a liar and a cheater.
Alexandra - Smart kick ass chic.
Alison - bra and pants are the same garment, looks better with the light off.
Amanda - IQ tends to be smaller than bra size. Probably a good shag though.
Amberley - queen of ice, no friends with a nasty mean streak. More than likely a lesbian but nice teeth.
Amir - dirty, smelly, pecker is minuscule.
Amy - devious, likes being on top, never stays the night - Not to be trusted.
Andrea - small breasts, drinks pints.
Andrew -usually short and very horny, watches cartoons.
Angela - Faithful. Romantic and sensitive when it comes to love. Likes a big cock, may like Darren.
Anna - has eyes bigger than her stomach. but her waistline shows it.
Annabelle - doesn't wear knickers.
Anne - looks like a horse, can't drive.
Annette - she's BIG.
Anouska - shags like a rabbit, not fussy about appearance.
Anthony - great guy and kind to all girls, smells of wee.
Antonio - has a great body and beautiful skin, and chicken brain.
Arnold - loser.
Arthur - hung like a slave and celibate.
Ashley - wanker who's losing his hair.
Barry - lights fires, pinches girl's bottoms and is well hung.
Beatie - she would rather jump out of a plane without a parachute than having to pick up a spider.
Belinda - pleasing on the eye, usually has a couple of good points.
Ben - kind hearted, will do anything for the one he loves.
Bert - looks like he has been pulled a hedge backwards and chews with his mouth open.
Beryl - repressed alcoholic.
Betty - makes simple tasks seem like brain surgery.
Beverley - trapped in an eighties time warp.
Bianca - ginger.
Bob - quiet and unpopular, eats with his hands.
Brad - thinks everyone likes him...but they don't.
Brandon - good looking but uses girls.
Brendan - quiet and sweet, gets beaten up all the time.
Brett - worldwide slut and really insensitive, women love him.
Brian - a wanna be charmer, he's not the Messiah he's just a very, very naughty boy.
Bridgette - eats pizzas all day, smokes cigars.
Britney - falsely improved, no use to society.
Bronsen - annoying and never grows up - has a stupid name.
Bruce - stinks bad and thinks everyone else's name is also Bruce.
Bryan - sexy, but stupid - can't spell.
Bryce - fun to be with and will make you laugh, you'll kill him within a week.
Calvin - immature in a naive way, drives a Gemini.
Cameron - Australian, like Bruce.
Camilla - replaces the word 'yes' with 'ya'.
Carl - thinks he's funny...he's not, falls asleep during sex.
Carli - pretty but more mouth and flirting than action in the bedroom.
Carly- the sexiest bitch in the world!!!!!!
Carol - into everything you've only ever read about. Coin-operated.
Caroline - into threesomes. Likes doggy style. Always up for it.
Carson - fun to be around and really sensitive.
Casey - painful lay, naive but with a sense of humour, possibly once a man.
Catherine - attracted to the older man, needs ironing.
Celine - emits hideous noises, waste of DNA.
Chad - cute, sensitive and very sturdy - only found in American movies.
Charles - can't trust him, eyes too close together.
Charlotte - enjoys tea and cake, can sing the national anthem.
Cheryl - can fit hand in mouth, eats glass. Has many ways with the boys - slapper
Chris - can't pull, will pay for men.
Christian - very sexy and seductive, full of his self.
Christina - hasn't got much of a life due to being a boring person. likes camels.
Christine - likes men in uniform, never warm.
Christopher - soppy and too clingy to make a relationship last. spends most of his life drunk and kisses like a washing machine.
Claire - perfect in every way and a complete sex goddess.
Clark - hilarious and always in trouble, problem with 'jailbait'.
Claudia - highly annoying. finds it hard to keep friends.
Clive - very sweet and adores girls, but prefers to watch.
Cole - nice, funny, and fun to be around.
Colin - lies to women and blows up public buildings.
Cory - funny but ugly, ends up running fashion magazines.
Craig - the lights on but no ones at home.
Daisy - virgin.
Damon - total loser in a sweaty sort of way.
Dan - quiet but funny, but becomes easily addicted to narcotics.
Dane - weird but can hold together a conversation with a mermaid.
Daniel - sweetest guy in the world, soft and gentle but good in bed! he's a keeper!!!!!!
Danni - should make nice threesome with sibling.
Darren – lovely and charming, bit of a romantic, more than adequate.
Daryl - smells bad, has no real mates.
Dave - extremely sexy, always funny, intelligent, stylish, trendsetter i.e. a wanker.
David - hottie and works out a lot, loves girls named Florence. Can be gay!
Davina - drug induced mental damage, should shave her neck.
Dawn - gets up early, smells of chips.
Dean - full of himself and thinks with his dick.
Deborah - bites the pillow, uses both hands.
DeeDee - cannot understand why no one else masturbates in Ikea.
Denise - sits on cat's eyes, wears too much make up.
Dennis - either very nice to girls or a faggot.
Derek - has a great sense of humour, and blow-up doll collection.
Diane - enjoys company of animals. Deep as a puddle. Adds nothing to society.
Dominic - hilarious and will do anything to please.
Don - dickhead.
Donna - 70's throw back, likes cabbage.
Doris - purple haired, stinks of wee.
Doug - has a greasy face, drinking problem and farts.
Drew - bad-arse loser who never shuts up.
Duncan - hopeless ski bum, brains shot away long ago.
Dwayne - cool guy to be around if you can handle his name.
Dylan - horny bastard, who can't sing.
Eddie - wants too many chicks he'll never get 'cos he's an arsehole.
Elaine - rides sidesaddle, drinks meths.
Eleanor - centre of attention when she walks into a room, not always for the good. has the gift of gab.
Elizabeth - born to perform, hates chickens.
Ellie - far too attractive for the swear words that come out of her mouth.
Elliott - full of himself.
Emily - wears odd socks but that doesn't mean she's not cute!
Emma - gullible and easily swayed by a good looker!
Eric - shy.
Estelle - likes wombles, eats grass.
Esther - plump with sagging breasts, normally heavily tattooed.
Ewan - a little slow but sweet, sexy, and model mental patient.
Faith - legs meet at knees, can't shag standing up.
Faye - wears wellies, can't swim.
Felicity - she'll stab you with her nipples, plays darts
Fiona - female mud wrestler, gives head.
Frances - gives oral for a one pence price. but loves to sow.
Frank - "different" - missing DNA - favours girls named Lucy.
Frankie - would make it as a farmer. people say she needs to shower more.
Fred - sucks pig's dicks & swallows the lot.
Gail - farts a lot, drinks Guinness.
Gareth - sweet but dresses too good to be straight.
Gary - dreams about mud wrestling girls. drug addict but willing to share.
Gavin - likes bondage, S&M with other men.
Gayleen - big tall woman who talks shite all day.
Gaynor - lesbian.
Gem - like an arm chair. comfortable, loved, odd.
Gemma - practically perfect in every way. Loved by everyone. Good listener and friend.
Geoff - prefers golf to sex and war to peace.
George - barman who drinks more than he serves, treats girls like shit also a wanker.
Georgina - wants to be a man.
Geraldine - too posh for her own good, likes flying.
Gillian - dyes her hair green, likes clubbing.
Gina - eternal mother, eats nappies.
Gini - Not to be confused with Jenny, attractive girl that has one boy always wanting to be her boyfriend even if it means doing crazy things for her. Likes more than adequate men, may like Darren.
Glen - the sweetest guy - really down to earth.
Glenda - eats children, hates smoking.
Grace - blubs a lot, wees in the bath.
Graeme - very hard to understand, likes group sex.
Graham - will screw anything.
Grant - HORNY! But so sweet and you can talk to him about anything.
Greg - really sweet and feels sorry for himself.
Hannah - needs to be naked at all times, eats kebabs.
Harriet - has a brain somewhere, will prob end up living on pizza.
Harry - has back hair.
Harvey - cute, but addicted to sex and/or drugs.
Hathem - smooth, but manipulative, not to bet trusted around young girls.
Hayden - tries hard.
Hayley - lives on dad's beers, is lazy bitch.
Heather - shags like a freight train, a screamer.
Heidi - the hills are alive with the sound of music, likes gherkins.
Helen - loves sleeping and alcohol and is work shy.
Henry - has gay like movements frequently. likes to run every where. would screw welly boots.
Hilary - frigid bitch. Thinks money grows on trees.
Holly - prickly to the touch, seasonal shagmeister.
Howard - likes small-breasted women and pornography.
Ian - really popular but knows all the girls want him... yeah right!
Ina - drinks tequila from the bottle, wets the bed.
Ingrid - right wing Nazi tendencies, never smiles.
Ivor - militant psychopath with homosexual tendencies.
Jack - shy and sweet but a slut when drunk.
Jackie - heroin addict, sold her child.
Jake - stupid but hot, always alright.
James - built like a horse. likes to bite while kissing.
Jamie - scum of the earth.
Jane - enjoys wanking men (or women).
Janet - soft, warm and really cuddly. Good shag.
Jasmine - smells of sewers, eats the heads off rats.
Jason - big headed. never fails to grab the girls attention, full of bullshit.
Jay - very sweet when you get to know him well.
Jeff - really ugly.
Jemma - does anal, wears too much eye make-up.
Jennifer - huge breasts, should shave her legs more often.
Jenny - a bitch thinks she's good
Jeremy - loud and thinks that he's all that he says he is.
Jerome - gay, but very unhappy.
Jesse - unpopular and needs to move on.
Jessica - virgin, always will be.
Jim - sweet, has fantasies of love and affection.
Joanne - moans in her sleep, cant cook, moans when she wakes up!
Jodie - absolutely perfect in every way, every group of friends should have one!
Joe - built like a bear, sexy but tends to lose his head.
Joel - arse.
John - has no friends or life - tends to kill small animals.
Jolyon - absolute raving homosexual.
Jon - countless two timer and bully.
Jonathon - loud, sex mad and great with it - can be full of himself.
Jordan - sexy but weird in bed.
Jose - hot boy with a love of hermaphrodites.
Josh - full of himself, fun.
Joy - would make a good exotic dancer. men love her.
Judith - big eyes, big tits.
Judith - Eats a lot, likes to feel superior.
Judy - huge tits, married to an arse.
Julia - innocent face, don't trust her, she'll steal your wallet in five minutes.
Julian - quiet and unassuming, might also go by the alias Mr Bobble.
Julie - Jabba the Hutt's sister, constantly pregnant.
Junior - hottie and totally good at football.
Justin - aggravating but loveable, insecure but successful.
Justine- massive tits, likes hanging around men's toilets.
Kain - the sexiest guy alive but very stuck up.
Kane - an absolute and complete arsehole.
Karen - too smart for her own good and is insensitive to others.
Kate - talks complete bollocks all the time, scavenger.
Katherine - is a follower. doomed to be successful but not completely happy.would fight for a tea cosy.
Katie - big feet, shags men over 50.
Keith - good person to talk to when you have a problem - his is worse.
Kelly - smells of cheese, slobbers when kissing.
Kenneth - very, very...anything you want him to be.
Kerry - perfect in every way and a complete sex goddess.
Kevin - always attracts really fit girlfriends also has a large penis.
Kimberley - wants to be a bloke, drinks like a bloke, farts like a bloke and wears a wig.
Kirsty - eats live moles, can't dance.
Kurt - can kick anyone's arse.
Kyle - hornball who eats too many corn chips.
Kylie - can't sing but who cares.
Lana - hated by her parents, accidental pregnancy.
Lance - Plays with his penis cos no one else will.
Lara - action packed, never seen naked.
Larry - cute but wannabe player with big arse.
Laura - likes Max power magazine, can't drive.
Lauren - pert breasts, seldom ventures out at night.
Laurie - short and funny looking.
Leah - likes outdoor sex, wees standing up.
Lee - girl dressed up as a boy, total arse bandit.
Lena - eats food then throws up, rapidly shrinking.
Leslie - likes bondage, hates men.
Lewis - lonely, sad git, bit of a tosser.
Liam - loud mouthed arsehole.
Linda - perfect in every way - a complete sex goddess.
Lindsay - likes doggy style, doesn't do housework.
Lisa - will take all your money and run, gets turned on by porn.
Livvy - pink, prim and perfect. people find this annoying.
Liz - good looking, definitely one to shag.
Lorenzo - fine and dresses in stolen gold.
Lorraine - constantly whinges, will strip for a packet of jellybabies.
Louisa - sensible head on her shoulders. collects socks.
Louise - real babe, bright too, I'd drink her bath water.
Lucas - fat loser that dates other men.
Lucy - strange dancer, wants to marry her dad. thief.
Luke - seems to be sweet. bit of a tosser though.
Lyndon - can always be found in bed or in the pub.
Madeline - drives like a bloke, likes tractors.
Maggie - trainspotter, likes plaid.
Malcolm - most end up with their name in lights. tends to lose his trousers. maintains a facade as an Estate Agent.
Marc - an idiot, who can't spell. would do anything for sex.
Margaret - lovely mother, very generous.
Maria - bangs like a barn door.
Marie - life's slapper. Likes men to do DIY.
Marilyn - eats like a horse, out stays her welcome.
Marina - no get up and go, rusty underwear.
Mark - wished girls liked him for who he is not his great looks, mouthy bastard.
Marsha - big butt, small brain.
Martin - can do impersonations. knows someone called Linda, yes the big fat lesbian.
Martina - ugly lesbian.
Martine - can't act, can't sing, nice tits.
Mary - gets hurt easily.
Mathew - has less brains than a donkey does in one of it's hoofs. thinks constantly about porn.
Matilda - likes dancing, mainly the waltz.
Matt - likes drink and is full of shit.
Meg - cheesy smell, should be spelt with an S.
Megan - loves nature, cares more for trees than people. radical and gets things done.
Melanie - can hold two bar vacuum orally indefinitely.
Melissa - eats dogs, been in prison 6 times for burglary.
Meryl - dances like an ape, doesn't realise.
Michael - very good looking but he'll do anything for a girl.
Michaela - likes animals, should make a video with them.
Michelle - wears white stilettos, dances round her handbag.
Mick - always drunk, tendency for drug abuse.
Mike - shag muffin.
Mohammed - small penis.
Monica - doesn't swallow, should have.
Morgan - the only thing that is big is his ego.
Mr Bobble - quiet and unassuming, see Julian.
Nancy - white hair, remembers manners.
Naomi - wannabe diva, more of a diver.
Natalie - eats with her mouth open, farts the Nokia phone tune.
Natasha - could use a face lift but is a sweet loyal friend
Nathan - stupid as hell, and tends to make others feel dumb.
Neil - sweet and will do anything in this world for you, great in bed.
Nell - hasn't realised WWII has ended, lives in Kent.
Nick - nice -can't get past the missionary position though.
Nicola - slapper, alcoholic in denial.
Nicole - girls hate her, men use her and dump her.
Nikki - loved up, eats cucumbers.
Nina - stuffs her bra with tissues, been single for years.
Nisha - hs a deep interest in the YMCA. falls in love easily.
Olga - you can park a bike in her asscrack, excessive facial hair.
Oliver - likes men but is in denial.
Olivia - neutron bomb.
Oscar - loser.
Owen - cute gay guy who is immature, and sings Welsh songs.
Pamela - gives amazing head, made of plastic.
Pat - forest forager, likes wild boar.
Patrick - drunk, drunk, drunk.
Paul - cool, calm and handsome, a quality only found in gays.
Paula - transvestite merchant banker from Basildon.
Penelope - pit stop queen, likes men to be stiff.
Penny - burps like a man, lives in dungarees and gets told to shut up a lot.
Peter - cutie but very shy, makes women feel like virgins.
Phillip - stupid idiot who wishes he were cool.
Phillippa - butt ugly lesbian.
Priscilla - likes painting with oils, Duckhams mainly.
Rachel - amazing gravity defying breasts, can grip a tenner in her asscheeks.
Raz - bit of a charmer, polite, thinks he's a Rapper, likes intentional loud music and has a fuck buddy. Works out, mainly on the top half. Wears boys briefs.
Rebecca - hairy armpits, orgasms without contact.
Rhia - alcoholic, goes after mingers.
Rhys - great lover but had his mind stolen by aliens a long, long time ago.
Richard - can't see his feet as balls are too big.
Ricky - ugly shithead who everybody hates.
Rikki - the fucking greatest in the world, everyone loves this guy... no faults at all.
Rob - constantly watches porn.
Ron - spends most of his time looking at the base of his spine, when his head is up his own arse.
Rosie - can be prickly, good head-giver.
Roy - total loser and computer genius.
Rula - she measures up well.
Rupert - arrogant twat who is crap in bed but thinks he is a stud.
Russell - likes to play in the leaves, which makes him an arsehole.
Ryan - tall with sexy body and even sexier mind.
Sacha - believes carrots make you see in the dark, likes crotchless knickers & Maltese's.
Sadie - stand up if you're slim, please stand up.
Sally - drives a Mustang, fights in pubs.
Sam - wannabe sex machine.
Samantha - loves her brother, has four deformed children.
Sandra - shags donkeys for fun, bow legged.
Sarah - hangs around with the wrong crowd, Kinky in bed, loves porn.
Scott - has serious disabilities. also takes it up the butt.
Sean - has small testicles and no friends.
Selina - doesn't wear pants, heavy laundry bills.
Seth - so sweet to other people but is a traitor.
Shane - not very nice, lies to pick faults (changed now)
Shannon - the most determined and persevering sweetie in the world.
Sharon - shags like a locomotive, yo-yo knickers.
Shaun - bit of a hard bastard, thinks women love him.
Shirley - can swallow a Curly Whirly whole, likes bananas.
Sian - does mean sheep impression, hates mint sauce.
Simon - likes a night out with the lads and curries. Says he is the man but talks bollocks.
Simone - used to be a shot putter from Cardiff.
Sonya - dirty lady of the night. Often referred to as a carrier.
Sophie - brothel madam, wears a wrinkly corset.
Spencer - loves it right up there, normally with a toilet roll and a hamster.
Stacey - likes crotchless jeans and assless Speedo's.
Steffi - closet lesbian, maintains heterosexual relationship for effect.
Steph - is a pretty, loved by her family and prince charming, has it all i.e spoilt daddy's princess.
Stephanie - eats Muppets, wears Brogues.
Stephen - Step Hen - likeable but has a really weird face.
Steve - popular and funny & hung like a donkey.
Stuart - droll guy with great arse and suicidal tendencies but great in bed.
Sue - totally gorgeous!
Tanya - hot minx, too short.
Tara - upper class slapper, needs extra chemicals.
Tash - lives about 10 seconds behind everyone in the world but makes up for it with her tits
Taylor - happy, laughing hyena.
Ted - hairy, sensitive and a great shag.
Teddy - great friend, crap boyfriend. clowns have been known to look more stylish.
Tiffany - annoying and clingy. but makes up for it by being damn fit.
Tim - hot but a bit strange, can never tell where he is.
Tina - face like a smacked arse, should eat less.
Toby - best blow ever.
Tom - extremely arrogant.
Tommy - no-one can have brains and looks. he is FYNE! but there isn't much behind it.
Tony - hot, sweet, and totally fun to be around, prefers getting done up the arse
Tori - lives in a hedge, can't water ski.
Tracey - lesbian.
Tracy - easily swayed by alcohol. Mostly seen without underwear. Loves kittens.
Travis - fat and horny with the best XXX collection to be found.
Trevor - sweet and funny but sometimes untrustworthy.
Troy - cute and popular.
Ursula - likes puppies, in curry.
Vic - Likes to go commando. dreams of futures with lots of leather and men in thongs.
Vicky- likes Yoga and Men. Perfect in every way. known to be very loud.
Victoria - too smart for her own good and is insensitive to others.
Warren - cool, homosexual guy.
Wendy - possibly a man.
Wesley - great guy and easy to tolerate.
Will - wishes he were popular.
William - tall, dark and handsome. ie when it's dark, he is handsome and tall.
Zach - sweet and polite and adorable.
Zack - thinks he is superman. great in bed due to ego.
Zahid - devious and sly. Not to be trusted.
Zara - face like an elephant's backside. cant see her toes from breast enhancements.
